Thongs, Bitch, Baby, and Honey

If you've never had the chance to sit down and listen to a flight attendant for a bit, you're missing out on a huge chunk of happiness. They have some of the freakiest stories around. Flying in a metal tube with a few hundred weirdos who don't know one another can do that to you. That's just my preface ----

Today, I was called BABE, HONEY, and BABY. I had to tell an older man, his wife, and his daughter why their adult son was being left behind (simple, really...he wasn't in the boarding area when we boarded our flight and departed). We had a lot of turbulence all day long.....and barely even got one of our beverage services done in a 2:42 flight time. I chatted up a few cuties on the UCLA and SC women's diving and swim teams. And I had to ask about a dozen people to turn off their electronic devices (that was after I had made three announcements asking them to do so). I had one lady ask me if I was the pilot (I was horribly distracted with her booby-tight black t-shirt with giant silver lettering on it). I snickered at the tattoo on the neck of another lovely young lady ("Bitch" was the ink she bore). And I got a bit nauseous when I glanced around the corner of the galley at my co-worker's request to see a precious young thing scratching her very low back/upper crack over her tightly stretched thong. I also got a poke in the ass...or near to it, anyway. Oh, and one more thing...I got to check out Harland Williams....the comedian.

That's my boring old day. How about yours? If you want futher laughs, I'd suggest you get a drink or two in your favorite flight attendant and get them to talking.