* * * My Words, My World, My Way * * *

Please Write: ALewisPDX@gmail.com

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Bored in Seattle

It is becoming clear to me, again, that my mind thinks in ways that other's minds do not.  I was always bored in school.  Boring.  No interest.  Could have been a straight-A student...but was more than satisfied with Bs, Cs, and even some Ds.  It meant nothing to me.  I was not challenged.

I have spent the last three months working in Seattle for several days a week.  Putting together a 4-hour flight attendant training project for my employer.  I've enjoyed it.  But it is painfully clear to me that I expect more of myself, and others, than they expect of themselves.  I want more.  I think in ways that others do not.  I am not satisfied with status quo.  I do not want another corporate training project or things that can be achieved elsewhere.  I have finished developing a piece for the program called "Becoming the CEO of Your Life."  Many, many hours of work.  And a very nice product.  Challenging.  Expecting introspection and personal work on the insides.  Expecting more.  Wanting more. Wanting participants to dig deep.

But I've been slapped on the hands.  Nope....too personal.  Can't do that.  We had something else in mind.  "Let's bring it back to boring" is what I've surmised from the comments.  So, for one more time in my life, I've been disenchanted with knowing that people simply are happy with status quo.  With medium.  With being good....not great or exceptional.  With being afraid of asking more of people or pushing buttons that may very well be uncomfortable.  So I'm back to middle ground.  Boring ground.  Nonchallenging ground.  Again, just like in school, I'm bored.


DanNation said...

You should come to Burning Man - you definitely won't be bored! Xoxox

Dave2 said...

We are living similar lives right now.

wcs said...

I know that feeling. With me, I always felt is this it? is this all there is? Not in any philosophical or spiritual way, mind you, just in the practical everyday way. I was bored.

Ur-spo said...

So you don't fit into the usual cookie cutter 'should' statements? Who cares! I've seen you both excited and passionate about other things (and some quite more important than mundane ones).

It sounds like you get schnookered into believeing something you are not, and thinking bad on yourself?

BosGuy said...

Wish you could come back out for Carnival Week in Ptown this week. Its anything but boring.

In all seriousness, I can relate. I don't feel that way with my current team and job, but I've been there and understand what you are talking about.

Anonymous said...

For what it's worth, I *love* the way you think and I often relate to many of the things you write here on your blog. Like you, I was bored in school and I approached my grades the same way you did.

I'm not surprised that others do not share the vision - I have run into the same circumstances before. We are told to look at "the big picture"; most don't realize that we are not even looking at the same wall in the museum, let alone looking at the same picture. It can be frustrating, especially when a bunch of hard work is dismissed.

I sometimes find sanity in knowing that there are others that enjoy the view of that other wall in the museum. It's not a consolation prize, it's just a different prize. Knowing that others somewhere, somehow share your passion, even if they are not part of that exact moment with you.