Christmas Cookie Disaster

Sunset Magazine December issue made the Frosted Ginger Cookies look so yummy....and the Cornmeal-Fennel cookies too. After three trips to the grocery store over the last few days, I thought we were all set to make them on this, the day we set aside to "get in the spirit" by making a few cookies. (Let's just say that we did, indeed, get into the spirit.....which spirit, I'm not sure....but, oh yea, we're in the spirit alright.) Should we double the recipe? We went back and forth on that a few times.....I was running back and forth to him with the ingredients, he was measuring and mixing. So, the first batch goes in the hot oven. You can see the results in the first and second picture that he's holding up for god and country to see. It's crap. (Damn that Paula Deen...she always makes it look so easy.) We left out a cup of flour. (I love the art of cooking.....I never did get very good grades in science.) They are flatter than pancakes and all ran together. Second round, we'll be OK, we decided. We'll just space them further apart so they don't run together. Should we re-grease the pan--no, it's got enough on it. You should have seen me down on my knees on the kitchen floor, spatula in hand, trying to get the second batch dislodged from the cookie sheet. Straight into the waiting trash can. Cornmeal-fennel cookies are in the refrigerator now waiting to be baked after the dough chills. We move onto the last recipe from the Food Network. We thought we may actually have one of these recipes work out. But, alas, not so much. I put the Baker's semisweet chocolate in a dish and into the microwave to melt. I think when we saw the black smoke coming out of the middle of the chocolate we knew there was trouble. "Just scoop out the burned part," he says to me. Um hum. Sure, I'll just do that. It all went straight into the disposer and down the drain. So, we have this nifty little bottle of semisweet dark chocolate syrup used for ice cream. It's been in the refrigerator for a while....and has now been drizzled across the top of the Orange Nut Bars (picture three). They may actually be edible. This is why I don't bake. Way too much science involved. I mean, I'm a good cook and can whip up an amazing meal for dinner. But screw the baking thing. I'll leave it to Homer and Adam. Let's go to their places for dessert.