The Inner Circle

It's funny how we all have our invisible "circles" around us. Some people have just one huge circle, some one very small circle, and others exist with multitude numbers of different-sized circles around them. Each ring admitting a certain group of people and situations into it based on level of friendship, past history, experience, trials and errors. Protecting us from harm or pain or even opening us up to exposure and where all of our terrible habits and actions are. Some of us are so trusting. Others will never be trusting. I think I'm kind of somewhere in the middle. From my side of things, I feel that I make friends pretty easily. I'm comfortable talking with most anyone even if I don't know them. But I know that I give off this somewhat unrealistic aura of being hard to get to know. A little bit of an asshole or even arrogant (okay, that hurt). I guess it's because I'm fairly self-confident, sometimes even to a fault. It's funny how life's experiences bring us to a variety of places at varying times in our lives. Interesting, too, how we see ourselves versus how others see us from the outside. I've got an incredibly dry sense of humor, can be overly serious, but also have this side of me that loves to be spontaneous and have fun. But, let's go back to the circles. We went to a Christmas gathering at our good friend A's house on Saturday evening. We've known him for seven years or so, had many meals with him, concerts together, and even a trip to Mexico. We're very good friends. He called us early on Saturday and asked if we would mind coming several hours early to help him get some things ready. Of course we would help. Now this is a guy who is ultra organized, always prepared, always thinking ahead, and is never short on making sure everyone has cards and gifts for their special days. So, for him to ask us for help, was actually a real honor. We moved furniture, made coffee, dug chairs out of his basement and dusted them off, put out silverware, set the beautiful table, and a variety of other tasks. Somewhere in the middle of this few hours, it occurred to me that my partner and I were on one of his "inner circles." No huge fanfare or bands playing. Just that he felt so comfortable with us to actually ask us, and allow us, to help him with the not-so-fun parts of the party. He knows us and we know him. It's a good feeling to know that it doesn't always have to be about orchestrated formal evenings together where everything is planned and no wrong can be done. It's all about seeing each other, warts and all, worn-out bedroom slippers and not-so-flattering boxer shorts, and know that it's okay. So, who's in your circles...your closest circle? Do you let people into it easily? Or does it take a very long time of proving themselves before you admit them in? Trust is a tough one. We're all where we are today because of a wide variety of messes and successes. And, as long as I'm asking, who has allowed you the privilege of being inside their circle of trust? It's a cool place to be. It's warm, cozy, and welcoming. One that comes with both pressure and privilege. And who knows....one day maybe he'll even allow me on the very inner circle that let's me clean the toilets and clean out the refrigerator. Wait....maybe that's the far outer circle.....and, furthermore, maybe I don't want to be in that circle. I'm happy right where I'm at.