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Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Ronald and Me


Portland, Oregon

McDonald's Drive-Thru

NE 82nd and Burnside

10:29am

Picking up Cholesterol-Laden Goodies for In-Laws



ME: I'd like a Big Mac Meal with a Diet Coke, please.

Ronald: I'm sorry, sir, we don't serve lunch until 10:30am.
ME: Oh, great. It's 10:29am now, so I'll just wait here a minute.


A hair's breadth of time passes....a mere smattering of a wisp of seconds......
and then the speaker crackles to life once again...it's now 10:30.....


Ronald: Welcome to McDonald's, may I take your lunch order now, sir.
ME: I'd like a Big Mac Meal with a Diet Coke, please.
Ronald: That'll be $$$$$ at the first window, please.

I love it when Ronald calls me "Sir."


28 comments:

christopherc said...

Oh the tales of fast food nightmares... I would have never guessed they were so capable of finding people incapable of thinking that work there. That is, until I experienced interacting with them on a regular basis.

bardelf said...

Oh this is a riot! Are you serious, lewis? Thank goodness they didn't make you drive round and round until 10:30 arrived.

That Ronald is such a clown!

Lemuel said...

Man! That just blows you mind! But I totally believe you. It shows just how whacked we are.

TJ said...

I have had this same thing happen to me but I was actually inside the restaurant. I have no idea what their point is????? I also stood there and waited. I should have said "Fine I'll go to Burger King."

The Neighbors Will Hear said...

It's a shame that more people don't get into dominant scenes with clown submissives.

Laurie said...

I HATE when Ronald calls me sir.
HA!!

Nude Canadian Boy said...

I had something similar once, I tried to order a burger at A&W at 10am and they too would not serve me anything but breakfast. I said screw it, and picked up a sandwich at the 7-11, I was heading out on a road trip, and was already running late.

Sorted Lives said...

Be thankful, if you were MaryEllen, they would be saying, Diet Coke, really, have you seen your hips lately?"

Alan said...

Sometimes I like to piss them off when they act like morons, by slowly driving by the window without stopping after ordering.

Durand said...

That exact thing has happened to me. Ronald said the same thing. I just smiled and replied, "Okay, I'll be right back". Drove around the restaurant,allowed a minute to pass,laughing. Went back through the drive-thru, ordered lunch, smirking at Ronald the whole time, paid, then drove away, shaking my head. They really fear that 10:29 lunch rush.

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh, that is too funny :)
I use to work at McDonalds and I would have made you wait too!!
Hope you are well and not working too hard!!
Talk to you soon
Lila

Timmy said...

LOL that is funny

K-A said...

That's too funny. You know I would call you sir in passing conversation, but it's a southern thing, y'all.

Tork said...

Does it mean we are in the decline part of the rise and fall of the american civilization when people leave their brains at home when they go to work? Well maybe not, but it's ain't good, sir.

-carywd said...

you made that up!
such a creative writer you are

Ur-spo said...

i try to avoid eating at The Evil Empire but events like these make it sound jolly good fun to try!

WAT said...

This post is f**king funny. Ronald is dumbass sometimes, but whatever.

DAMNIT, I never eat McDonald's but I'm sure craving it right now. ARGH!

dbv said...

i love that these people cannot make an "executive" decision and take your order a minute early... that's why i never eat fast food... it scares me that when these people do make "executive" decisions, it's usually something like, "sure, that burger patty is still good, it was only on the floor for a second"...

Billy said...

And I thought this could only happen at a Mc D's in South Africa...

Really funny Lewis!

Tony (LT) said...

Just goes to show you that the best things in life happen because the timing is right. ;-)

And when Ronald doesn't call you "Sir." you grab him by the back of that nappy orange head teach him to say it...and to not gag.

Atari_Age said...

Sex and clowns do not mix. Ick.

Cooper said...

Love it. Sir. Doesn't that just make you feel all good and superior coming from someone who can tell the time to the last second?

Kev said...

It is just a guess but their computer systems probably don't allow any "lunch" orders to begin until 10:30am. If that is the case, then the employees can't very easily use their brains.

Greg said...

See? He calls you sir then asks you to pay for it. My goodness.....

kenny said...

how did the protest go?

dazedblu* said...

Oh yeah that was really funny but I like how you tell you loved beign called "Sir" :0

Anyways nice blog here, well droppin' and btw I love the Spirit of Saint Lewis, above these entires.

Palm Springs Savant said...

are you KIDDING ME???? sheesh what was in that kid's mind?

foot frenzy said...

Are you fucking kidding me?! I don't know why I'm shocked. I'm with "bardelf" though, I am very surprised they didn't make you pull around either!

Those poor schmucks working there. Though I did my time at Mickey D's in H.S. Ugh!!