Hey! Got your attention, I hope. Because I've got a serious question for you: Do I look (even remotely) like Morgan Freeman? Come on now, be honest. Because that's what I feel like sometimes. And, as long as I'm asking pertinent, probing questions, does my honey bear any resemblance to Jessica Tandy? Because that's what he probably feels like sometimes too. Oh, I know most of you've seen it...you can't deny it....the movie, that is...Driving Miss Daisy. I'm whistlin' that catchy little diddy of a tune in my head even as I'm writing. You see, our relationship has gone through numerous ups and downs, pretty times and pretty damned ugly times. And plenty of plain old odd/strange/freakish stages. And one of those is this: I am the chauffeur in our family which is why I feel like I'm channeling Morgan Freeman many days. I know you probably won't believe this, but in our nearly 11 years together, I've never been a passenger in a car driven by my (sweet, loving, devoted, caring, kind, happy) husband. And there are times here and there that give off the distinct illusion that I'm driving around in a Hudson or Cadillac just like Hoke did in the movie. (Only there's a little caveat in our 2008 relationship.....I insist that my honey lets me stop to make water).
Back to my Honey: He gave up his driver's license many years ago while living in the Castro and Mission Districts of San Francisco. He didn't need the car. And from there he migrated to downtown Seattle and eventually to downtown Portland. If you've been to Portland, you know full well that a car is not necessary living here...we've got, arguably, one of the best transit systems in the nation. So, no car or license for hubby. Wild and wacky, I know. And he does too. It's odd to watch the faces when people find out that he doesn't have one. "Oh," they say. "Really?" No, like I'm making this crap up just for your enjoyment. It's for real. And, like I tell him, why in the world would you get a license now? You've got an Academy Award-winning actor, film director and narrator driving you around. I wouldn't get one either!
But there are times in our lives when I feel like that's what I've been relegated to....driving. Like that's a good chunk of why I'm put on this earth and all I'm good for. And, don't get me wrong, I like to drive. In fact, I'm in love with cars. And the few times I've actually taken him out in the middle of nowhere and demanded that he drive me around a vacant parking lot has made it clear that it is very possible that maybe I don't want him driving. He swears that he'll "jump the curb and wrap the car around a telephone pole." I tell him that's what the brake pedal is for -- to avoid that sort of ill-gotten situation. And I'd do anything for him. He knows that, I know that. We have numerous buses next to our home and he does a great job of going wherever he wants to. But sometimes, even just once, I'd like to be in the passenger seat. In fact, unless someone else is driving our car for us, I will never experience the passenger seat or the back seat.
And so, the Morgan Freeman-Jessica Tandy duo continues. Only hubby's not Jewish and I'm not African-American. But we do play one on TV.
18 comments:
:) Yes, Lewis, you look ever so slightly like Morgan Freeman. He's taller than you, though, I get the impression from pictures.
I'm a driver. It's what I do. There are times when I ride and someone else drives. But deep down inside, I am a driver.
Does your sweet wonderful husband have a picture ID card to take the place of a drivers' license? There are times such things are necessary.
"Home, James!"
:-D
I wouldn't know what to do without my driver's license. But I've never lived in a place with a decent public transportation system. I'm all for utilizing public transportation if it makes sense to use it.
While your system works for you, I think maybe Honey might get his license in case there is an emergency and he needs to drive you somewhere. He's a big boy, he can do it—I know, my teen son is going through it now.
I am the driver in our household, too. Spouse drives himself to work, but EVERY time we go anywhere together, I am the driver. I usually prefer it, but occasionally I have asked Spouse to drive me if I have a bad headache or something, and he will. But since your hubby no longer has a license, that's not an option for you, my dear. If you want to experience the passenger or back seat of your car, I recommend you get a friend to drive you in your car.
Mark :-)
Even if I didn't own a car, I'd probably still retain a license. It's an extremely convenient form of id.
I would guess if you wanted it badly enough, your man would get a license so he could drive every so often. Or he'd at least hire someone to drive so you could both enjoy the back seat. ;)
it must be the lighting.
I know that this is kind of joking, and kind of not. I know, because I gave up my license a little over a year ago, due to a sensory processing issue.
Hubby sometimes feels like he is "just" a driver, but I feel like I am sometimes an inconvenience. And sometimes I feel like HE thinks I am an inconvenience, which is much worse.
We are making it work, and working it out. I'm glad to hear of another couple who has made that work in the long run. It would be a tad easier if we lived downtown, instead of the 'burbs, but as you say, Trimet is great, and the slowdown isn't a bad thing either.
For the couple of people who have mentioned emergencies, an unlicensed driver can legally drive in a legitimate emergency.
Come to London and I'll drive you around or I can drive you in Portland, if you trust me driving on the wrong side of the road :-)
Hubby drives and I dont and I have no licence-- I was always a city boy so never needed one....He is my Morgan Freeman!
I'll come over to Portland some time to be YOUR Morgan-Freeman-for-a-day.
I can think of reasons and ways you (and your hubby) can experience the back seat without _either_ of you driving!
One funny memory for us regarding driving is when my partner was in the driver's seat and she is freaking about about traffic and directions and such. Without thinking, I said aloud (not so amused at the time) "_I_ should be driving and you should be sedated!" And so it continues... :)
This is so familiar. I am our designated driver. My fabulous Other Half is a excellent licensed driver. I have full confidence in his driving. It took a while for him to get up the courage to get out on the roads here after our move from the UK. I've always done the driving on our frequent trips to to Europe and Canada over the years so was quite used to the "other side" of the road thing.
While I was away for a week earlier this year he took the car out and did a fair few miles and was pleased as punch to tell me of his explorations and mastery of driving on the wrong side of the road.
So why then the reluctance to do some of the driving? It seems the problem is me! How is that possible? I'm such a helpful passenger always ready with some useful advice or observation. Apparently none of this is particularly welcomed and is cited as reason along with "oh but you love driving". Yes, but once in a while a little sharing would be nice.
I guess I've got a learn little lesson of give and take.
Now that you mention it...If I
squint my eyes, cross my fingers,
turn my back and look upside down..
.......No.........and your hubby...
.......No.........Sorry, If you
feel you have reached this answer
in error Please wait 30 days for
the full refund purchase price...
What? I'm a Gemini.... :)
HUGS!!!!!!!!
I loved not having a car. Then we got one last year.
But I could see how always having to drive would become burdensome.
I guess there could be worse comparisons. But as I recall from Driving Ms. Daisy, those two had a swell relationship together. My brother never renewed his driver's license either after moving to the Windy City.
My hubby was and is ususally the designated driver, but we had 1 car for 10 years and he was the one who picked me up and dropped me off so it was a habit to let him drive. Now that we have 2 cars for the first time in 10 years, I have gotten used to driving and sometimes I drive when we're together. Not to fret, handsome, we will Miss Daisy your ass all over this town and you will never have to touch the steering wheel, leaving your hands free to wander.... he he he
My husband is the driver when we are together, but otherwise I drive myself wherever I want to go. On occasion I will drive when we are together, and it just seems strange. My husband does not like it when we are "out of routine."
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